coward

paulo coelho said that in life, there are no victories or defeats – only a continuous cycle. attaining success at one thing doesn’t mean it’s the end of the road for you. it doesn’t mean your journey stops there. it just means that up next is another success or failure.

and the same is true in falling in love. losing the one you love doesn’t mean your world will end. it just means closing of one chapter so another chapter could open. but paulo said not everyone is brave enough to seek love again once they have lost. and if one doesn’t try, he won’t fail in love. but he won’t attain victory either.

this made me wonder about my life. it made me think that i may have been single for a very long time because i wasn’t brave enough. i haven’t experienced defeats in love for a very long time, but i haven’t been victorious either. just because i wasn’t brave enough. i was stagnant. i was a prisoner of my own love because i didn’t open up myself. and that’s maybe why these deep feelings have been resurfacing in my dreams about my ex lately.

i should be brave – even when it comes to love. in my career and in other aspects of my life, i am a risk-taker. but in love, i am a coward. and i understand this now. and since awareness is the key to solving any dilemma, maybe this will amount to something good.

i hope and pray it does.

i’d like to end this post with the lyrics of the song “one hello.” pretty much sums up what am feeling.

If you’re not afraid
Of what love brings
Then endings are beginnings
Of beautiful things
It’s a chance you’ll take
It’s a chance you’ll win
If someone’s gonna find you
First you gotta let them in

Coz love begins with one hello
The hardest part is over
Now it’s easy letting go
One hello is how it starts
You might win it all or lose your heart

If you’re not afraid
Of what you feel
Then try and keep it simple
Or try and keep it real
And if being real
Means you’ll someday say goodbye
Remember my friend
Goodbyes not the end
It’s a circle you know
And it starts with one hello

Oohh…
Love begins with one hello
The hardest part is over
Now it’s easy letting go
One hello is how it starts
Remember my friend
Goodbyes not the end
It’s a circle you know
And it starts, starts with one hello
It starts with one hello

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